Jim,
I've been part of small groups that formed, met once, then never materialized. But more recently I am finding other groups to join. A friend of mine works at Genentech and they have enough avid photographers that they organize outings. I've been with some of them on night shots.
I think the style of group you describe (small, informal, irregular) is probably the best formula for success. I've wanted to form a group, but the act of formation seems to kill things off rather quickly.
jason
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