I'm going to do digital collages if the money is there....
You could try taking the bottom part off a pair of binoculars and gluing it to a lensboard. If you have a focal plane shutter, you're good to go. I don't know if all would have great swirly stuff, but it's cheap enough to try.
"I love my Verito lens, but I always have to sharpen everything in Photoshop..."
Just borrow one from Eddie.
Maybe a rental? This is just a phase, right?
What's next, a wooden camera for your soon-to-be "vintage lens collection"?
Magnifying lenses from Walmart or Target might give the desired "look". I saw some very interesting work high school kids did with this approach using a view camera.
Try a 67mm +2 and +3 close-up lens stacked on top of each other.
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