The Sitter Apocalypse

[John Kasaian]

Less and less people are available to sit for portraits. With our shrinking population (hey this is science) pretty soon there won't be anyone to sit, much less set an f-stop, soup film or make prints.
Going digital is not the answer, obviously. How will we get batteries and flash cards if there are no people around to make them? Besides I don't think digital people are all that attractive, at least not my "style" I'm more into gritty realism.
I figure film availability should be the least of anyone's worries---less sitters= less film! Sort of like nature taking care of its self.
I am going to start hording sitters. If film keeps in the freezer I'd bet sitters will too. I figure I need a freezer about the size an ice cream delivery truck to freeze enough sitters for the rest of my life. Stacked like cordwood I'm certain I could squeeze quite a few in there.
But first I need some answers:
Will freezing "suspend" aging? If so I'll need an assortment of infants, kids, teens, young adults, middle age and seniors to cover all my bases
Are there zip lock bags big enough to hold sitters? I know there are body bags, but will these work when frozen? Also body bags aren't transparent like zip locks so imagine the drudgery of having to open up every single one inorder to find the tatooed college co-ed, or the steel spectacled accountant (for that corporate report)
But back to my questions:
How long can I expect a sitter to remain frozen and still be "good?" I've heard people in Azerbajan live a long time. Will they alo hold up better frozen? Who has the best pricing on Azerbajanis? I'd call Badger Graphic but I think this is one time the savings on shipping from Frestyle might trump the savings on sales tax from Badger Graphic. Should I call B + H and see what kind of beal they can give me?
Please let me know as soon as you can. I want to start hording before other LF photographers catch on and drive up the pricing.
TIA

[matthew klos]

wtf is this?

[Vaughn]

I thought it was going to be about zombie baby-sitters...

[msk2193]

Let's safe this thread and safekeep it for police when there is a slue of people who go missing int the SJ Valley.

[Nathan Potter]

John, let me know what you have been drinking so I can make sense of your concerns.

Nate Potter, Austin TX.

[cdholden]

I am going to start hording sitters. If film keeps in the freezer I'd bet sitters will too. I figure I need a freezer about the size an ice cream delivery truck to freeze enough sitters for the rest of my life. Stacked like cordwood I'm certain I could squeeze quite a few in there.
But first I need some answers:
Will freezing "suspend" aging? If so I'll need an assortment of infants, kids, teens, young adults, middle age and seniors to cover all my bases
Are there zip lock bags big enough to hold sitters? I know there are body bags, but will these work when frozen? Also body bags aren't transparent like zip locks so imagine the drudgery of having to open up every single one inorder to find the tatooed college co-ed, or the steel spectacled accountant (for that corporate report)
But back to my questions:
How long can I expect a sitter to remain frozen and still be "good?"

John,
I've got some coworkers here I'd like to offer for your collection. Shipping would be prohibitively expensive. Local pickup only.

Chris

[Roger Thoms]

John, the only real problem I can see is freezer burn. Maybe vacuum pack them before freezing.

Roger

[Thebes]

Ironically, I just watched some youtube videos about Hiroshi Sugimoto.
Just carve them in wax and you can photograph them after they are gone.

[Ross Chambers]

wtf is this?

They (the rest of the world) believe that irony is one of those things Americans just don't get.

I was unconvinced, bur I'm given pause.

There was quite a lot of portraiture in Victorian days of recently deceased folk for remembrance by the relatives, perhaps that's an option?

[dsphotog]

Well..... They'd hold still while you compose / focus / load / time exposure / etc.