ND grad filters for 8x10 and the tale of 3 bears

For my birthday I have asked for a set of Lee ND grad filters for my 8x10.
Whilst I shoot mainly FP4, in part because of cost, I do have a stash of Provia 100 in the freezer. My only lens at the moment is a Apo-Symmar 240mm but I a likely to get a 360 or 450 in the near future.
So , back to the story of the 3 bears ...considering the large size of the ground glass, do I need to buy the hard (Daddy bear), soft (Mummy bear), or medium (Baby bear) grad filters? I have had conflicting advise from Lee and one of their resellers, who Lee suggested I call about the matter, so am unsure which way to go.
Some say that I should go for the soft set for subtlety but others say go for the hard set as the soft will be too gentle on such a large viewing area. Will a 360 or 450 have a similar effect as a grad fitted to my 240?
Confused.
Of course I could go for the medium grad but no-one has suggested that.

thanks ...Sweep

I just watched a video on the Lee website (Joe Cornish explaining the very hard and medium grad filters). Seems that the very hard might be of interest if you make images of seascapes. I imagine it would be no good to me as the few times I've used neutral grads with LF it's been cityscapes or in mountains, where I think the hard grad would be a nuisance.

He also mentioned it would be useful with the small sensor digital bodies - sounds like marketing hype to me, not sure how that's supposed to work. Even if true, 8x10 isn't a small sensor.

I'd just get cheap ND grad filters from China off eBay to have a look and see what you think at first.

I watched that video myself after making my post as I remember him mentioning Goldilocks which was a complete coincidence!
I have a local stockist who keeps trial sets of different levels of graduation (hard, medium, soft) Lee filters so I plan to give them all a go. Not ideal as I will be in a shopping centre and the staff have already advised, not suprisingly, that they have little experience with filtering 10x8 but I am grateful for the opportunity.

For Large Format the thing to beware with is vignetting that the filter holder might cause, the catch to test for is vignetting when at full rise/shift as you might not actually see vignetting with the lens straight on.